Theory of Mind is the ability to not only understand that people have different beliefs, motivations, knowledge and moods but also understand how that affects their actions and behavior as well as our own. Theory of Mind is a necessary component of perspective taking.

Perspective taking refers to our ability to relate to others. It is our ability to perceive someone else’s thoughts, feelings, and motivations. In other words it refers to our ability to empathize with someone else and see things from their perspective.

Most people can intuitively tell how someone else feels in a conversation. When they speak to someone who’s looking around and not paying attention, they perceive the person is not interested in the conversation or is distracted for some reason. They know if they see tears in the person’s eyes that the person is upset.

Not a Sign of Intelligence
Someone with Theory of Mind Impairment will also have poor perspective taking skills. They will miss many of these cues. In some cases they may miss all of these cues. As with many other factors contributing to social skills deficits, one can be of gifted intelligence and not have effective perspective taking skills.

Theory of Mind and Perspective taking skills begin to develop in the womb and continue throughout our lives. A newborn child should try to imitate facial expressions within the first few weeks of life. This is quickly followed by pointing, the development of language and joint attention by twelve months.

By Age Two
By age two, the ability to understand what is in the mind of others and that they are different with their own needs and desires. Children at this age are learning how to “get their way” through give and take as well as manipulation. They are also becoming aware of other’s efforts to manipulate their behavior and are developing strategies for dealing with such attempts.

Children who have difficulty understanding the motivations of themselves or others have some level of perspective taking dysfunction. This is also true of children who have difficulty developing strategies for give and take.

These children will continue to have difficulty with social situations throughout their lives. Social Skills Therapy is necessary.

If you are concerned about your child’s social development either call (914) 488-5282, or fill out the form on the right side of the page for more information about how we can help.

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When most people think of social skills they think of things like not burping in public or saying “excuse me”. And while both things fall within the realm of social skills, they are but a mere piece of social competency. Social skills are made up of hundreds if not thousands of unwritten rules. They are the verbal and non-verbal cues that we depend on to navigate our way through all of our social interactions.

Social Interactions Are Extremely Complex
Not only must a child be aware of his own thoughts and actions but he must also be aware of the thoughts and actions of others. This is true of any situation in which there are two or more people. They do not need to speak in order to interact with one another.

Consider if one child is sitting alone reading. If a new child walks into the room how does the new child know if he should say hello? What does it mean if the first child never looks up and draws his book closer? What does it mean if the child looks up, smiles and then looks back down at his book without saying a word? What if he holds his gaze and does not look down? How does the environment effect the actions of the first child? Are the rules different in a library versus a cafeteria?

Easy for Some Confusing for Others
For most people these situations would be relatively easy to understand. They would be able to navigate these situations with little if any conscious thought.
However for someone who lacks social understanding these seemly simple interpretations of other people’s actions are very confusing.

You are able to interpret other people’s actions, motives and inferences because you have something called theory of mind and perspective taking. Those are two of the areas that children with social skills deficits have problems. To put it another way, they lack the ability to see things from other people’s point of view and understand that other people have thoughts, beliefs and desires that drive their actions.

Fortunately social skills can be taught.

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